When did your friends turn into a group text?

When did you last hang out with your buddies on purpose?
Not bumping into them at a kid's birthday party. Not reacting to a meme in the group chat.
On purpose. On a Saturday. Because you wanted to.
If you had to think about it, you're not alone.
The friendship recession is real
In 2021, the Survey Center on American Life asked men about their friendships and compared the answers to a Gallup poll from 1990.
In 1990, 55% of men had six or more close friends. By 2021, it was 27%.
The share of men with no close friends at all went from 3% to 15%. Five times higher.
That's not a few lonely guys. That's roughly one in seven men you pass in the grocery store.
Nobody decides to lose their friends
It doesn't happen in one dramatic moment. It happens in small pieces.
The new job eats your evenings. Kids eat your weekends. Somebody moves to Naperville. The rec league folds because half the team blew out a knee.
One day you look up and your social life is your wife's friends' husbands.
Why it hits guys harder
Researchers who study friendship keep noticing the same pattern. Women tend to build friendships face to face, talking. Men tend to build them side by side, doing something.
The team. The crew at work. The guys you played pickup with every Thursday.
That works great until the activity disappears. Then the friendship drifts, because most guys never learned how to keep one going without something to do.
So the fix isn't "call your friends more." Be honest. You're not going to.
The fix is to find the activity again.
Why the gym works
A good gym gives you the thing you lost after high school sports: a regular time, a regular place, and the same faces suffering through the same workout.
We have guys (and ladies!) who started working out in the same class and now spend their PTO days together on the golf course, at the range, or hanging out at a brewery.
And there's a bonus. While you're rebuilding your crew, you're also rebuilding your body. The strength you build at 40 is what lets you carry groceries, lift grandkids and climb stairs at 75. Longevity over intensity. Every time.
Come try it with zero pressure
On Saturday, Nov. 7, at noon, we're hosting Barbells & Beers, a free, guys-only workout and hangout at CrossFit Roselle.
Here's how it works:
- We lift. A partner workout, coached start to finish. Every movement scales, so the guy who hasn't touched a barbell since 2004 and the guy who trains five days a week both finish smiling.
- Then we hang. Cold beers, NA options, snacks, and no rush to leave.
- Bring someone. A buddy, your brother, your dad, a coworker. Or come solo. You won't stay solo long.
You don't need to be "in shape." You don't need to know what a clean is. You just need to show up.
Book your spot here: https://crossfitroselle.wodify.com/OnlineSalesPage/Main?q=Classes%7CLocationId%3D3580%26OnlineMembershipId%3D37282%26IsMobile%3DTrue%26ProgramId%3D20304
See you on the 7th.
Source: Survey Center on American Life, "Why Men's Social Circles Are Shrinking"


